tea time

My sweet little girls decided to have a sweet little tea party and since I'm on a New Year, new me kick, I decided to go all out and make them sweet little star sandwiches to go with their tea(it makes me feel like a good mom). They helped set the table with sandwiches and cookies and "tea" and sugar and clementines. Very sweet. And the sweet little tea party quite quickly(like within a matter of minutes)turned into this.

Because if you know my(very sweet)little girls, you also know that they don't stay that way for long. My girls are spunky, energetic, a little bit feisty(sometimes alot bit), strong willed and very independent. All good traits, for sure. All challenging traits at times, as well.

And then it turned into this and I decided it was time to put the sugar away.

A big part of what I'm striving for this year is to become a more chill mama. Because let's be perfectly honest...I'm a freak. Really. I have a bit of an anxiety problem, I get overstimulated and irritable far too easily and lately, I feel like I'm frustrated the vast majority of the time and yelling far too much. And then I can see it in my kids, too. I'm constantly telling them to "use nice words, please", "change your tone", "don't yell at your sister", "we need to help teach her...", "listen to my words". What I really need to do is start listening to my own words and setting the example that I want to see in my kids. I want, need to change this. Now. And I am trying. A true conscious effort is being made by myself to stop, breathe and let it go. To not get frustrated over spilled milk(so to speak)or water or sugar or 5 baskets of toys all over the floor. To take a breath and use nice words instead of angry, frustrated, irritated or sarcastic ones. To listen more, play more, laugh more, argue less. To chill out and let it go. Because in the long run, a puddle of sugary "tea" on the floor isn't worth getting frustrated over. And getting irritated over something so silly certainly isn't what I want to be teaching my kids is the way to behave.

Relax. Breathe. Let it go.

I'm working on it.